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June 1: Get Rid of Negative People
Happy June, Everyone!
It’s the start of a new month, yesterday, I told you all about the power of positivity. Today, I thought I would elaborate on one way to do that, by getting rid of negative people around you. I think it is by far one of the most effective and difficult things to do. We are surrounded by an array of people on a daily basis, family, friends, colleagues, acquaintances, even random strangers. It’s impossible to ensure that they are ALL having a positive impact on you. Obviously, the more people we encounter, the higher our chances are of being surrounded by negative people. Realism must be taken into account when approaching this subject. I’m not suggesting cutting people out of your life, point blank (although there are situations where this is not only doable but an absolute must). But, for the times that is not a viable solution, what can you do?
What you CAN do, and with some ease, is minimize your contact with the negative people in your life. The people who are always complaining about how the universe is out to get them, or forever in a state of despair. Those are the people you need to find a way to stay away from because you know what they say, misery loves company. It’s no lie. Negative people love it when they can get someone else to join in on their pity party. I’ve been there, even done it to some extent and have never been happy in such a state of mind. I experienced this mostly in my post college era and it took me a few years to practice distancing myself from a particular friend. I spoke to them less, hung out less, answered their calls and texts less. Eventually, I got my distance until said person finally got their act together and realized that half the problem lied in their approach to life.
Sometimes, the culprit can be a loved one and those situations are the most difficult to distance yourself from. Imagine being surrounded by people who are constantly sulking in their misery, it’s depressing! No matter how strong YOU are, if your surrounding is constantly singing sad tunes, you will eventually succumb to it. I know because I deal with this on the regular and often find myself straddling between frustration and resentment. It takes an immense amount of willpower to ignore it and/or listen to it and try not to be negatively affected by it. It’s hard…it’s REALY REALLY hard. But I work at it. I often offer positive feedback and suggestion as a means to get them to think beyond the negative, sometimes it works, and at other times it doesn’t.
I’ve made a long term plan for myself on how to get my distance, but the short term day-to-day struggles are a challenge. Having that long term plan, however, is a great incentive to get through the immediate difficulty. First and foremost, I try to physically distance myself from the situation, whether its going for a drive, walking to the park, reading a book, putting on headphones, writing or simply lighting a candle and meditating. Any kind of immediate and positive self reinforcement helps alleviate stress. I take each moment at a time, I stay strong and work my mental state back to calm and clarity.
It’s been a learning process, but in the recent years, I’ve gotten good at distancing myself from people who do not play a positive role in my life. When it becomes difficult, I always remind myself that I should come first to me. If I can’t put my own well being first, I most certainly cannot expect someone else to.
YOU are your first priority and a healthy mental state is the key to a healthy and happy life.
I hope this has helped you, even a little bit. I know I haven’t said anything you don’t already know, but sometimes we all need a gentle reminder.
Happy Ridding of Negativity!